Dementia: Always explaining myself

I went to see a doctor the other day, because I have a long standing problem with my knees and they hurt.   I have not been able to use steps/stairs for a couple of years now.

Dr-Who-Daleks-Cartoons-Punch-Magazine-Birkett-1981

So, I explain that I have a congenital deformity in my knees and they are so bad now I can’t climb stairs etc…   Doctor asks me to explain what ‘congenital deformity’ I have.  “The knobs on the top of my tibia are too narrow for my patella to move over up and down without rubbing the bone, and my patella sits too high”  I answer then telling him that I had an operation on one knee in my 20’s giving the correct term –  “A Tibial Tubercle Transfer”.   He murmurs something about my patella, which I don’t quite catch so can’t answer him.

His next question is:  “Why do you have your medication in a nomad pack?” (see my previous post on this subject)  I suddenly feel like I am in a parallel universe in a different consultation.  What?

Me:  “I have Alzheimer’s”.    Dr: “You have it delivered weekly?”  Me: no I collect it monthly.  Dr:  4 packs at a time?  Me: Yes!?!?  Another Doctor from this surgery phoned the chemist and arranged that I could pick it up once a month.  I am not housebound I cannot change my life to collect it every week.

Then I find I am justifying myself by telling him that my Alzheimer’s is at the very early stages.  I say this twice.   I swear if I find he has stopped this arrangement to give me a  4 weeks of nomads packs of medication I will scream….. Arrrrrrggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!   and breathe…

Knees, focus on my knees!

And yesterday I go for some X-rays on both my knees, some standing up, then they tell me to go over to the bed.     I don’t understand what they mean?  So they repeat ‘go over to the bed‘.    This is where my dementia kicks in, go over to the bed, then what?  Do they mean me to get on the bed, sit on the bed, lie on the bed?  I am tired of my brain not working properly at times.    It is frustrating not being able to understand the meaning of simple sentences at times.  It makes me feel stupid, which of course I know I’m not but other people don’t know that when I am not responding.   The X-ray technicians would not know I have Alzheimer’s which makes me even more embarrassed that I stood there like a dummy whilst trying to work out what to do.

Hey ho.    Onwards and upwards.  🙂

 

 

 

Author: Gill

I was diagnosed with Early Onset Alzheimer's in Dec 2012 aged 58 after 20+ years of memory and other cognitive difficulties. It was both a relief and a shock getting the diagnosis. But, I am determined to live a happy and productive life with this disease. Enjoy what I can do and push as much as I can physically, mentally and emotionally will always be my mantra :) My plan is to live simply, create a wildlife garden for birds and bees to enjoy when I can no longer garden.

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